Nihilitarianism

All my life I've been running ahead of myself, trying to make the most of my time as if I was already doomed — but I have no intentions of dying. I have to live long enough to become immortal, and failure is not an option. It's all that matters, because from there on I will become one with everything. How I get there doesn't matter nearly as much, just as long as I make it: I just need to become a better person to get ready for that, whatever it takes, whatever I'm missing out on now in the process.